The "Coming" Woman
New York Ledger
Feb. 12, 1859
Feb. 12, 1859
MEN OFTEN SAY, "When I marry, my wife must be this, that and the other," enumerating all physical, mental, and moral perfections. One cannot but smile to look at the men who say these things; smile to think of the equivalent they will bring for all the amiability, beauty, health, intellectuality, domesticity, and faithfulness they so modestly require; smile to think of the perforated hearts, damaged morals, broken-down constitutions, and irritable tempers, which the bright, pure, innocent girl is to receive with her wedding ring. If one half the girls knew the previous life of the men they marry, the list of old maids would be wonderfully increased.
Doubted? Well, if there is room for a doubt now, thank God the "coming" woman's Alpha and Omega will not be matrimony. She will not of necessity sour into a pink-nosed old maid, or throw herself at any rickety old shell of humanity, whose clothes are are much out of repair as his morals. No, the future man will have to "step lively;" this wife is not to be had for the whistling. He will have a long canter round the pasture for her, and then she will leap the fence and leave him limping on the ground. Thick-soled boots and skating are coming in, and "nerves," novels and sentiment (by consequence) are going out. The coming woman, as I see her, is not to throw aside her needle; neither is she to sit embroidering worsted dogs and cats, or singing doubtful love ditties, and rolling up her eyes to "the chaste moon."
Heaven forbid she should stamp round with cigar in her mouth, elbowing her fellows, and puffing smoke in their faces; or stand on the free-love platform, public or private --- call it by what specious name you will --- wooing men who, low as they may have sunk in their own self-respect, would die before they would introduce her to the unsullied sister who shared their cradle.
Heaven forbid the coming woman should not have warm blood in her veins, quick to rush to her cheek, or tingle at her fingers' ends when her heart is astir. No, the coming woman shall be no cold, angular, flat-chested, narrow-shouldered, skimpy sharp-visaged Betsey, but she shall be a bright-eyed, full-chested, large-souled, intellectual being; able to walk, able to eat, able to fulfill her maternal destiny, and able --- if it is so pleas God --- to go to her grave happy, self-poised and serene, though unwedded.
Doubted? Well, if there is room for a doubt now, thank God the "coming" woman's Alpha and Omega will not be matrimony. She will not of necessity sour into a pink-nosed old maid, or throw herself at any rickety old shell of humanity, whose clothes are are much out of repair as his morals. No, the future man will have to "step lively;" this wife is not to be had for the whistling. He will have a long canter round the pasture for her, and then she will leap the fence and leave him limping on the ground. Thick-soled boots and skating are coming in, and "nerves," novels and sentiment (by consequence) are going out. The coming woman, as I see her, is not to throw aside her needle; neither is she to sit embroidering worsted dogs and cats, or singing doubtful love ditties, and rolling up her eyes to "the chaste moon."
Heaven forbid she should stamp round with cigar in her mouth, elbowing her fellows, and puffing smoke in their faces; or stand on the free-love platform, public or private --- call it by what specious name you will --- wooing men who, low as they may have sunk in their own self-respect, would die before they would introduce her to the unsullied sister who shared their cradle.
Heaven forbid the coming woman should not have warm blood in her veins, quick to rush to her cheek, or tingle at her fingers' ends when her heart is astir. No, the coming woman shall be no cold, angular, flat-chested, narrow-shouldered, skimpy sharp-visaged Betsey, but she shall be a bright-eyed, full-chested, large-souled, intellectual being; able to walk, able to eat, able to fulfill her maternal destiny, and able --- if it is so pleas God --- to go to her grave happy, self-poised and serene, though unwedded.
Fanny Fern
To cite this project:
Fanny Fern, "The 'Coming' Woman," Fanny Fern Archive, Ed. Haley Jones (2019) http://fannyfernarchive.org.
Fanny Fern, "The 'Coming' Woman," Fanny Fern Archive, Ed. Haley Jones (2019) http://fannyfernarchive.org.
